Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Random Observations From My Seat in the Peanut Gallery 06.10.15

Obamas former press secretary, Robert Gibbs, was hired by McDonalds to help with communication. Not missing a beat, Gibbs said complaints about cold french fries or missing orders will now be blamed on the previous McDonalds administration under George Bush..

 John Kerry is telling sources that he was riding his bike just fine until he was swift-biked by some Republicans

 CNN's Erin Burnett suggested that Pamela Geller "relished the idea of being a target by Muslims." Obviously not as much as Erin Burnett relishes the idea that people think she is a credible journalist.

 Lindsey Graham has invited Bruce/Caitlyn Jenner to be a part of the Republican party. Graham will need a very strong VP candidate for him to even get close to the White House and he understands that Jenner has always been a strong runner.

 Jimmy Carter told the AARP this week that most Americans are white racists.
Carter, of course, spends his time thinking its still the 1970s, still hopes to get a second term, and is still trying to "catch them Duke Boys."

 Democratic presidential candidate Lincoln Chafee said that Hillary Clinton "is too corrupt to be president. " Chafee, of course, has no chance of winning the nomination. Not because he is so unknown, but because the Democratic Party does not nominate candidates who tell the truth.

 Hillary Clinton said last week that her candidacy will "restore faith and confidence and optimism in the future of the country we love." It's not clear which country on her donor list she was talking about.

 Truth be told, Hillary Clinton would be the best candidate the Democrats could offer. She clearly best represents everything sick, twisted, and fraudulent in the Democratic Party.

 ISIS should already be WasWas

 Why do we need guns? Because it's real hard to throw a rock 1200 feet per second.

 American Pharoah has won the Triple Crown. On Monday he will announce his 2016 candidacy for president.

Regardless of the rumors, American Pharoah does not have his own email server.

 Take notice, Tom Brady, American Pharoah won the Triple Crown without deflating any footballs.

Somewhere, Hillary Clinton is wondering how American Pharoah could have won without donations from the Clinton Foundation.

 Somewhere Karl Rove is very surprised that the Belmont Stakes wasn't won by Ohio.

The New York Times has made no effort to find any paper trail to uncover Benghazi, the IRS, or even Hilary Clintons emails. But they did find out that Marco Rubio and his wife have gotten 17 tickets. Next up: Did Ted Cruz turn in all his homework in 6th grade??..??